One of my favorite quotes is from my big sister Christy. In the midst of her struggles with health and the challenges of being a missionary overseas, she became convinced, “God will never waste pain that’s offered to Him.” I love that. God will never waste your pain. He will never waste your heartache. He will never waste your loss.

If you’ve lost something precious to you—a dream, a marriage, a child—I can’t tell you exactly the purpose or plan, or what the future holds, but I will say that God is loving, that He is sovereign, and that although your heart may be broken in a million pieces, He will never leave or forsake you. And He can and will use even the bad to orchestrate good.

I want to be clear that I’m talking about pain that’s been given to Him. If we hold on to our hurts, our heartaches, our struggles, our losses, and refuse to surrender them to Him, we become bitter. And we relinquish the opportunity for God to do something with it—whether it’s to mold our character, teach us something important, grow us in some way, or make a difference in the lives of others.

The Bible tells us that God causes all things to work together for good “to those who are called according to His purpose.” If we let Him, God can use all things for good, even the bad.

I know it’s easier to hold on to the bad stuff, to control it to some extent, and to keep God out of the picture. But when we do, we’re the ones that suffer.

Trust God. Trust His heart. Trust that He loves you. Trust that He has a plan. If you have to do this grudgingly at first, dragging your feet along the way, that’s okay. It’s at least one step in the right direction.